Anger, guilt and shame are intertwined in all sorts of ways and although everyone ‘suffers’ from them at some point, we generally hardly learn how to deal with them. Except perhaps that you have to swallow them. But where exactly do they come from? How are they connected? What is under the surface?

When we are triggered, we sometimes do not like to feel our emotions. We are more likely to fall into negative thoughts and make analyses about what is wrong with ourselves or someone else. We think in judgements, in right and wrong. If your reaction is directed outwards, if you mainly think that the other person did something wrong, then you are talking about anger. If your reaction is directed inwards, then it takes the form of shame or guilt. And if you do not give your emotions space for too long, this can lead to feelings of depression. You have then lived longer than you can sustain without being in touch with your needs.

Empathy is the antidote to guilt, shame and anger. On this day we will look at what needs are alive under our reactions and what is needed to be able to react in a different way than you may have done so far.

The training will be given by Suzanne Nederlof (Empatilya) and Boris Nauta (Equanimity) on June 21 in Wageningen and on December 12 '25 in Amsterdam.